


Not Without You

by msruchita



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-21
Updated: 2018-12-21
Packaged: 2019-09-24 02:32:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,153
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17092385
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/msruchita/pseuds/msruchita
Summary: SHIELD gets a new consultant with a mysterious past, catching the determined attention of Sergeant Bucky Barnes.





	1. Part 1

**Author's Note:**

> I’ve received a few questions regarding the confusion of the different points of view especially in Part 1. So, I’ve devised a guide.)
> 
> Reading Guide:
> 
> *** - This when it is another character’s POV
> 
> Italics - Flashback memories
> 
> ~ - Also used for flashback memories

‘Just drop it, okay? One night doesn’t mean anything.’

Steve stared at Bucky incredulously. 'You’ve been moping around since that trip, and now you’ve started getting F.R.I.D.A.Y. to hack into people’s profiles because all you remember is her face. So don’t tell me it didn’t mean anything. She matters to you.’

Bucky glared at him. 'Shut up. People do it all the time right, what do they call it - hooking up. We hooked up, and that’s the end. She’s not my mission.’

'You’re in love with her. You don’t want to tell me anything, fine. Admit it to yourself, she’s more than a one night stand. She is your mission.’

Swiftly changing the subject, ignoring Steve’s knowing gaze, he gathered his things, as the hover jet descended down at SHIELD headquarters. 'Whoever this new consultant is, Fury was right about her. The intel she gave was spot-on.’

What had been estimated to be a three month long operation, turned to 38 days, when the newly hired consultant supplied them with intel that allowed them to infiltrate a Hydra meeting in India. Over 20 members were arrested, and they were being transported on the jet to be interrogated by Fury personally. Possessing an in-depth knowledge on HYDRA and on various subjects alike, she was considered an incredibly rare find when Director Fury hired her as an consultant.

However, there were also several rumours circulating as to how she came across this information. Many of them involved her exchanging sexual services for knowledge, while others spoke about how she was even more ruthless than the winter soldier. Some of the male agents had taken to calling her 'pocket Venus’, a term later he learnt meant a petite yet extremely attractive woman.

As they made their way towards Fury’s office, they caught a few agents gossiping about the new consultant. 'Such a huge slut. I heard she fucked 87 HYDRA agents. Really? She’s so nice and sweet whenever I meet her. Good god, you know she’s probably faking it just to get your boyfriend. Just saying, keep your boyfriend away from her. Definite man stealer.’

'Do you come here to gossip or somehow attempt to actually contribute to making the world a safer place? Good to know what SHIELD is paying all of you for.’ Director Fury strode out of his office, sending everyone a scathing look. ‘And for your information, she killed 87 HYDRA agents in under seven minutes. That’s more than I can about your efficiency in filing a simple report. There was a small flurry of activity as everyone hastily went back to work, whispering about the new information. Bucky smiled internally, this woman sounded like a badass, as they followed after Fury, for their debrief.

***

You were heading towards the pantry to make yourself a cup of hot chocolate before the debrief with Fury, when upon hearing Nico, you paused. He sighed deeply, as one of the agents sipped coffee from my mug. ‘I guess the saying is true, never judge a book by it’s cover. Y/N looks so sweet and innocent, who knew such a whore was behind that facade. Thanks Nico, for letting me know. I was about to ask her out, but now I’ll see if I can get a quickie with her.’

Striding in boldly, I stared at the dumbfounded expressions, embarrassed at being caught. Taking the mug from his hand, in a perfect Russian accent, I asked, ‘Alright lover boy, let’s see your best in three minutes.’ Going white, he muttered some unintelligible excuse, and practically sprinted out. Nico spat in his mug before throwing the now cold coffee in my face and stalked off.

Closing my eyes as a cold lump formed in my chest, I swallowed back my tears. Counting to ten, I rinsed both the mugs and raced back to Fury’s office undetected. Seeing the room empty, I realised he had already left for the debrief with Captain America and the Winter Soldier. Desperately scrubbing my shirt with a couple of wet wipes I found, I let out a loud sob, and the unshed tears fell freely as I clutched the corner of the desk, my mind flashing back to that fateful day.

_~_

_‘Y/N! Y/N, if you don’t fucking get up right now, I’m going to leave you. GET UP NOW!’, Nico yelled at me, as I slid down to the floor. He shook me hard, and I just couldn’t bring myself to open my eyes. My head kept lolling to the side, it was so heavy. I just wanted to sleep. There was sudden darkness and then I felt someone pick me up. Groaning, I tried opening my eyes, but the leather seats felt nice and cool beneath my heated face._

_A crisp British accent came through, ‘It’s okay, we got you. You’ll be safe with us.’ Someone started tugging my top down exposing my chest as I clasped my tube top tightly. Their hands pulled at mine, when I started throwing up. ‘Oh god. Yuck! Just clean her up. She’s still fine as hell.’_

_It had taken me five seconds to understand that I was neither in my bed nor at home when I opened my eyes. Somehow wobbling myself to the mirror at the end of the room, I stifled a cry of shock seeing my body littered with scratches and love bites. Hearing an amused sigh, I turned back only to see five men, staring at me hungrily. ‘Good, you’re awake. Now we can have fun.’_

_~_

For the next 17 days, I was their new plaything, someone they dominated and raped repeatedly. Even when I passed out from the sheer exhaustion of constant orgasms, they would keep going, using any and every hole they desired. They had done more, but my own pleas, and their laughter asking me to continue begging drowned out anything else.

Shaking my head hard, their taunts reduced to silence as I wiped my face, and applied a new coat of lipstick. Dumping my ruined shirt into the trash, I dug through a pile of clothes Fury kept for the Avengers in case they wanted a change of clothing. Choosing a red henley, I threw it on, ignoring how the smell of caffeine clung to my skin as I grabbed my files and headed towards the meeting room. Hopefully, I could still catch them.

***

Wasting no time, Steve debriefed Fury as they were walking down towards the meeting room, as they went down one winding corridor after another, when a small form slammed into Bucky, causing him to automatically react. His knife flicked out of his sheath, only for it to vanish in mid-air, twirl expertly and hold against his throat.

He gasped softly as your dark e/c met his, and every memory of you came flooding back. At 5 feet tall, she was still the cutest spitfire of an enigma he had come across, an irony considering she was extremely honest and straight forward, believing while the truth hurt, lies destroyed. She was leaner now, and yet as lushly curved as he remembered. Her hair short before, was braided down her back, stopping just before the curve of her ass. His eyes dropped lower to admire how she still filled out better than nicely despite wearing pants. Round, big and so luscious, lips curving into a smirk at how much she had loved having his hands on them.

Her eyes travelled down the length of his arm, as if stroking it. He remembered the way she had accepted it, like the way she accepted his scars and him. He could almost feel his hand fisting in her hair as she slowly proceeded to start licking-.

‘Mr.Barnes? Are you still a part of this conversation?’, Bucky came back to reality, grinning widely, as Fury turned to Y/N. Steve looked at him strangely, while he continued staring at her. Several curls had escaped from her plait, and her cheeks held a rosy tint, as she panted slightly. 'Y/N, this is Steve Rogers and his best friend, James Barnes. Men, this is our new consultant. She will be working rather closely with you Sergeant Barnes, as you both have history with HYDRA.’

Steve reached for her hand first, as she shook both of their hands professionally. Slowly folding up the sleeves of the shirt she was wearing, her expression took on a more serious note, against her soft look. ’Do you believe the rumours about me, about what I did to escape?’ Y/N asked bluntly, ignoring how both the super soldiers flinched while Fury looked at them. 'If I am to work with Sergeant Barnes closely, it means the Avengers will be watching my every move. Understand that I will not allow myself to be a burden or a pity case on any one of you, if there is even a shred of doubt.’


	2. Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> SHIELD gets a new consultant with a mysterious past, catching the determined attention of Sergeant Bucky Barnes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reading Guide:
> 
> *** - This when it is another character’s POV
> 
> Italics - Flashback memories
> 
> ~ - Also used for flashback memories

Bucky jolted awake, sweat drenched and hard, his hand up and curled as the taste of Y/N lingered on his tongue. Sighing deeply in the chill of the morning, Bucky realised he was alone, grasping at nothing. Sinking back on the bed, his hand reached under the pillow grasping at a small piece of fabric, his mind swimming as it settled on that moment.

~

‘Why me?’

His steel blue eyes completely fixated on the small heart tattooed on top of her left breast, snapped up in surprise.

‘Why would you want me? You must have flocks of women chasing after you, wishing to be yours. Anyone of them would make an excellent submissive for you.’

She hastily looked down, but he heard the small catch in her voice, betraying her insecurity. At a loss for words, he gently stroked her hair, when she abruptly stood up and walked towards the edge, her arms wrapped around her tightly.

Following her immediately, he came behind her, his hand going to the nape of her neck and squeezing. Silently wishing he was better at articulating his thoughts and emotions, she sighed, her shoulders releasing tension when he squeezed a second time. Closing his eyes and cursing, he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close, only squeezing tighter when she struggled to get free.

After freely submitting to him, she was slowly coming down from subspace, and as a dominant he should have known better that she needed that aftercare. Rather than forcing his own selfish desires on her, it was of utmost importance that she knew, as the fragility remained, that she mattered not just as a sub, but as a person; his person. The act of submission was as freeing as it is draining, and he felt the fight go out of her,  as she slowly sank to the ground, completely wiped out. Even then, her will shone through as her eyes shut, refusing to look at him.

‘Kitten, please look at me. I’m so sorry. I never meant to hurt you.’

Near desperate, he kept his arms around her forcing himself to accept that he may have ruined a good thing before understanding to cherish it. Treat her with respect and she will obey, not only because she wants to, but because she needs to; the true base of a sub/dom relationship. His heart thud dully in his chest, tears falling freely, as he prepared to let her go.

He found himself pulled down, forced onto his knees, as she rose up in the same position, her hands holding his tightly, asking again. ‘Why me?’

‘You give your submission to me freely; accept me as I am, without even knowing who I am or my name. I want to know you, all of you, your interests, your desires, what makes your soul burn so bright. Being your dominant means being yours as you will be mine; teaching you with firmness yet I will never hurt you; Handling you with trust, love and honesty with the faith you will do the same. Understanding your submission is your trust in me. Trusting that you will cherish my love for you; even if it may never be reciprocated.’

Shaking from his confession, he blinked back tears when she let go of his hands; and started when she placed them on his cheeks, reaching up to kiss and lick the tear tracks. Her compassion and understanding undid him, his heart so full he felt it would burst.

‘You make me need you; all of you. I lay my soul bare and my heart forever open; offered in loyalty and honesty.’

He bent his head down to find that small heart that captivated him so, and bit down into the soft flesh, marking her as she sank her teeth just above where metal met flesh.

~

‘Mr.Barnes, we’re leaving in 30 minutes. I was wonde-, it’s alright, nothing important’, Dr.Banner knocked on his door quietly, then hurried away. Noting the slight waver in his voice, Bucky reminded himself to speak to him later. Hey may not know what to say or what to feel; it didn’t mean he didn’t care.

Proceeding to strip off his clothes as he entered the shower, he let the cold water wash away the last remnants of the dream; his mind on Bruce and Y/N. After the initial shock at seeing him, her eyes had carefully gone blank, staying that way till she left as abruptly as she appeared. Any attempt to inquire about her was shut down by Director Fury when he scathingly replied, ‘Y/N is currently with Dr.Banner and Thor, discussing how to extract information from the HYDRA members. Is her past going to be an issue?’

Steve jumped in quickly, dragging Bucky out of the room, recognising the small twitch in his fingers, ‘No sir. Just curious that’s all.’

He tried to pull away the moment they were out, but Steve held tight, suddenly hugging him. To anyone else, it would have looked like two friends comforting each other, but Bucky understood the gesture, as Steve whispered quietly, ‘That’s her right? Stark has started looking into her, something about this doesn’t add up. She didn’t exist until a few months ago, and was last seen talking to one of them. We need to know for sure she isn’t part of HYDRA.  Listen, for now, don’t ask any questions. Just trust me, okay?’  

Fingering the small grey kitten on his chest, with its tiny paw prints running in loose loops across to his left shoulder, he quickly showered and dressed in a simple green henley with a pair of jeans. A cryptic note with specific instructions had been sent to STARK Towers.

Natasha, Clint, Bucky, Sam and Steve entered through a manhole, hidden in one of the hangars at S.H.I.E.L.D, down a tunnel so deep down, they couldn’t see the end. ‘Is it just me or does this scream trap?’, Sam muttered as they descended down the ladder slowly one at a time. Bruce and Thor decided to stay behind and help Tony prepare for some party he was throwing. Usually not one to socialise, Bucky felt party planning was a brilliant idea compared to climbing down to god knows where, all of them cursing when the lights in the tunnel went out.

‘I get it why we were advised to only bring one weapon,’ Natasha said after a few minutes, struggling to avoid being smashed by Clint’s quiver, accidentally causing them to slide down slightly into Clint. After much grunting, they were able to manoeuvre slightly around where they were still tangled, just not packed against each other tightly. Breathing hard, Steve became aware of something scurrying up his hand.

Realising it was a cockroach when it reached up his bicep, he tried blowing it away from him knowing any sudden movements would result in them losing their grip. Rather than moving to the wall like he anticipated, it ran down his arm to Sam’s face, and headed down his neck. The moment he felt it on his neck, he screamed loudly, startling everyone causing them to fall, the lights in the tunnel coming back on as they collapsed on top of another, dust rising. Bucky heard Clint sneezing as he looked up realising they maybe only fell about 100m.

Natasha burst out laughing, unable to keep a straight face, as Clint and Steve joined in; Bucky chuckling as Sam finally cracked a smile. ‘Some test huh?’ He asked, standing up and brushing off dust from his clothes, as if screaming like a little girl because of a cockroach was a daily occurrence. Still grinning, they turned to face a huge thick steel door with a single screen next to it.

Composing themselves, they huddled around the screen, just as a electronic owl with huge eyes popped out startling them all. Realising it was a security camera, they calmed down. ‘Your full names and finger scan please.’ A small rectangle slid out beside the screen. One by one, they took turns, scanning with their chosen fingers, the owl acknowledging them till it was Bucky’s turn.

‘Bucky Barnes,’ he said, scanning his ring finger. ‘Access denied. Your full name and finger scan please,’ the owl’s message came again. ‘James Barnes,’ he said cooly, scanning his finger again. ‘Access denied. Your full name please,’ the message came again.

‘I don’t use my full name,’ he protested as it parroted the same message again.

Muttering under his breath about annoying birds, Bucky grudgingly said ‘Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes’, scanning his finger as it acknowledged him.

‘James Buchanan, as in the 15th President of the United States?!’

Before anyone could say anything, the door slid open, and a large dark grey wolf stood, staring at them.

Purely on instinct, both Clint and Bucky stepped towards it and Natasha grabbed his hand. ‘What are you doing?’, she hissed at him. ‘We have to follow it. I don’t think it’s going to hurt us.’

Saying so, they walked after the wolf, Bucky followed after with Steve, Sam sighing loudly, running to catch up with them. It was like navigating through an labyrinth; only having a wolf for a guide. Going down one corridor after another, turning to another direction at the most unexpected at time, and having to climb stair after stair, was beginning to take a toll on them. Clint had started panting heavily, stopping every now and then to take a breather, while Natasha and Sam were trying their best to remain professional but they couldn’t hold back their yawns. Due to the serum, he and Steve neither felt sleepy nor tired as the wolf finally came to a stop at a mirror.

They stopped abruptly when there was no reflection to be seen. The wolf touched it’s paw to the mirror, and they watched in amazement as the wolf disappeared through the mirror. ‘Here goes nothing’, Steve touched his hand to the mirror as it disappeared through and then pulled it out, laughing softly. ‘It’s really windy.’

He stepped through the mirror, disappearing, and they all followed behind, gasping as they found themselves in the rolling highlands of Scotland, mats laid out in a circle as a pyre burned a few feet away. Fury sat on one of the mats facing the west, as a loud cracking sound drew all of their attention towards the wolf.

Fur turned to skin, bones and muscles shifting around, the slightly elongated teeth growing smaller as a huge mass of curls appeared. Ducking under a blanket Fury handed over, there was a slight rustling as they saw jeans and a sweater being pulled on through the movements. Pulling the blanket off her, she swung it out over the three of them, their teeth chattering loudly over the crackle of the fire. Y/N stood up straight, cracking out her neck slowly as they stood rooted to the ground, stunned.

‘I’m really terrible at small talk, so I’ll skip the formalities. I believe we haven’t met, my name is Y/N. Captain Rogers, Sergeant Barnes, my apologies for failing to mention that I am a werewolf.’ Y/N smiled at them, her nervousness as endearing as her kindness when Clint, Natasha and Sam each shook her hand from under the blanket, thanking her for the blanket.

“Please call me Steve, and him Bucky. You make us sound old,’ Steve ruffled her hair, as she stood between the two of them, clad in ripped jeans and a sweater that dropped off one shoulder. Quickly explaining that Y/N had found some new intel, Fury explained that their enemies had gotten wind of some of it, hence, the secrecy. Bucky dropped a swift kiss on her bare shoulder unable to resist the smooth skin, as she turned to glance at him, stiffening slightly.

His heart skipped a beat only to squeeze painfully the next moment. Remembering her dark e/c, shining brightly when she smiled, now one dark e/c and one forest green, were bleak despite the brilliance of colour, pain flickering in the depths. Shaking her head minutely at the question in his eyes, he nodded in agreement when Steve turned back around.

‘So, what is the greatest weapon on a battle field?’

Fury glanced at them, as they blinked at the random question. ‘You’re being tested, answer carefully.’

‘Courage’, Clint answered, as she smiled almost devilishly. ‘What is happiness?’

Natasha shook her head, smirking, ‘You should thank Loki for this. Illusion.’

Giggling, she clapped her hands softly, ‘And, the greatest gift?’

Watching Steve continue stroking her head, he noticed he seemed calmer, almost like- his gaze snapped to her. ‘Blessings!’

Beaming at him, the shadows no longer present, he smiled back at her, reaching towards her when Fury barked out. ‘Great to see you all getting along, now sit down quickly. I’m freezing my ass off here.’

‘Can the intel be trusted?’, Clint asked Fury once they sat down, the three of them huddled together.

‘We think there is a mole in S.H.I.E.L.D, maybe more, and that they have been manipulated by the charisma of the men you both captured,’ Y/N said gesturing to him and Steve, as she sat between them.

‘These men are guilty of using black magic against their enemies, explaining how HYDRA has acquired their newfound success in a mere year. Please be warned that they are extremely dangerous, and they can cause you harm,’ she continued on seriously.

Steve scoffed at her warning, and even Fury hid a smile as she stared at them, her face wooden. ‘Do my words sound funny to you?’

The icy whip of her tone, sent everyone into silence. Her gaze turned to each person slowly, boring into them, as the unpredictability of her actions, had them slowly reaching for their weapons. Never had they experienced someone so terrifying that even Steve was holding his shield tightly; his knuckles white from the strain.

‘I knew you would not believe me so I brought proof,’ her voice suddenly light as if she had not just shown them true terror with a single look. Sliding the sweater to the other shoulder, she pulled out her right arm, and Clint whispered in horror, ‘The fuck. Who did that?’

Her entire arm from shoulder to hand had been slashed viciously. Deep grooves had been cut in a horizontal manner, and though healed, the wounds still looked red and angry. On her wrist, lay a single solid bangle, about an inch thick. Bucky struggled to compose himself at the sight of her injuries, suppressing the rage that ignited within him. Names of men had been inscribed on the outer surface, and the wounds looked worse near her wrist as it hit him.

She had been collared, but against her will.

Quietly, he asked the question burning in their minds, as his metal arm flexed tightly, prepared for battle, prepared to kill the ones who defiled her, ‘What happened to you?’

She whispered, barely audible ‘They happened.’


	3. Part 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> SHIELD gets a new consultant with a mysterious past, catching the determined attention of Sergeant Bucky Barnes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reading Guide:
> 
> *** - This when it is another character’s POV
> 
> Italics - Flashback memories
> 
> ~ - Also used for flashback memories

~

The tension could have been cut by a knife, as everyone silently stared as Y/N calmly poured herself a bowl of cereal, offering everyone a bright smile, seating herself next to Steve. Gripping his magazine so tightly, Sam’s hands began to shake slightly from the strain, watching her eat spoon after spoon without saying a word. Only when she looked up did she see everyone staring at her. Bucky avoided eye contact with her, as he mumbled about wanting more coffee as he went up the machine to pour himself a new cup.

Finally taking a little pity on her, Steve offered her a tentative smile before shaking out the paper he was reading, flipping to the next page. In a rather unsubtle manner, Thor cleared his throat, as he pointed to Y/N. ‘Lady Y/N, Wilson was explaining that HYDRA is currently using black magic. Do you have proof? This sounds like something Loki would think of, come to think of it…’

He trailed off, looking thoughtfully at her. Taking a deep breath, she finished her cereal, excusing herself as she got up and rinsed her bowl and placed it inside the dishwasher. Smiling again, she gave a small nod, grabbed her bag, and briskly walked away. They sighed in relief when they heard the elevator door ding open, then close.

‘Either she is the best actor in the world; or she really is that dense. Why can’t we just tell her? We already know everything, and since Bucky here is too chicken to ask her about it, I say let’s just cut the dead weight.’ Natasha shrugged, slowly stretching as she reached past Bucky, almost brushing against him, for the coffee.

‘Harsh much? We don’t even know what is in the video, or if the note is genuine. We could all just be walking into a trap where someone wants us to believe she’s evil when she’s not.’

‘Quick to defend aren’t you? Want to fuck her, hard, like how every guy has dreamt of since she stepped inside SHIELD?’ Natasha purred in his ear, baiting him as every nerve in his body reacted to her words, as he shifted the magazine in his hand to the front of his jeans.

‘Nat, stop it. This isn’t helping, however, does anyone feel like-‘, Steve stopped at the sharp look from Bucky. They both an intense eye conversation before he blinked in affirmation, knowing he would get an explanation. ‘Bucky and I will watch the video, and Bruce can help us determine wether the handwriting matches.’ Bruce started at his name, before nodding, catching the unsaid message.

Ignoring everyone else’s protests, they followed after Steve down to Stark’s playroom as he called it. Unknown to them, Y/N, silently followed after them, slipping inside before the door shut, crouching behind what looked like a large turbo engine. She forced the elevator doors open when she realised she forgot her headphones when she overheard Natasha’s jibe. As the conversation continued, she realised that she had only dreamt about telling them about her and her arm. They actually had no clue she was a werewolf; or that her arm was heavily scarred. She blinked to regain her focus, as their voices drifted over.

‘Stark, just tell me what did you find about, about her. Either way, I’m done with her. She was just a good fuck.’ Bucky gritted his teeth, forcing the words out, like he wished to wash the taste of her name from his mind. ‘Calm down, Metallica. It’s not at all what you expect. Which is why I asked you to keep it a secret from the rest. Knowing Thor, the whole world would know about it within 10 minutes, or worse he would ask Loki to read her mind. Which trust me, is best that we don’t.’

Jarred by his response, he slammed his fists down on the table, creating a huge dent as he heaved slightly. From her position, she shrank back in agony, her heart silently breaking as she heard his heart rate increase, felt the waves of anguish and betrayal come off him as she chewed her bottom lip.

’What do you mean? What is on the video?’ Bruce asked slowly, afraid of the answer as he glanced at Bucky. His hands were now clutching a half-developed motor, in an attempt to control his temper, the metal squeaking slightly against the pressure.

The sounds of flesh slapping, and grunts of pleasure suddenly came through the small speaker next to Steve. Even to an amateur, it could be told that there was more than two participants, as the thrusts became louder, as the groans of pain started leaking through. They heard more than one man laugh and command the woman to take them as it is, even as she wailed in pain, barely able to form words.

Bruce took a seat, his face taking on a green tinge, when her wails and groans became louder at each passing minute; the thrusts so loud, you could imagine the sweat and body fluids leaking out of their bodies. A sudden metallic scrunch made them look up, as the motor flattened itself in his hands. Bucky was shaking, not from anger, but from utter regret.

Y/N sobbed, but never once screamed or begged for them to stop. He knew it was because they wouldn’t stop; they would just keep going, keep laughing at her. Even in her worst moment, he could feel her resolution; her will and strength to fight them; to not give them what they craved for.

‘Fucking bitch, just cum already. Waiting for your lover boy to come and make you cum? You belong to us. We created you. Cum for us. Cum for me now. Now!’

There was a sudden slam, and then it came again. They banged her head on a hard surface repeatedly, and then the slams came faster, till even Steve and Tony went white; and then they heard someone intervened.

‘Stop. You’ll kill her! We own her right; we’ll make her cum. Go take a cold shower. You’re done with her for now’

There was a sudden thump, and the sound of her choking and blubbering came. Whoever it was, just kicked her in the stomach, as the other guy yelled at him to be taken away. It was obvious that he was the mediator; the slightly more rational one as he whispered sweet nothings into her ear.

Y/N shook uncontrollably; reliving every moment as she felt him gently wiped away all the cum, blood and other fluids from her skin; her body shaking from the brunt force of today’s session. She preferred the others to him; at least they were honest about what they wanted. He on the other hand, was the true snake. Even from the recording, Bucky could hear the venom seeping from his voice; though it was camouflaged to come out comforting and soothing.

She inhaled sharply when he pressed down hard on one of her bruises; before squeezing the head trauma that his brother had left. Swallowing the cry of pain that threatened to burst out; she looked at him, willing herself to not shake under his deceptively gentle touch. ‘He will never come, you know that. He doesn’t know your name; where you come from; who you are; what you are. Yet, you still pray in his name. Do you think that just because he bound you to him, collared you, somehow, you will be able to call to him. Cry out for help? Remember where you are, Y/N. Our sweet, innocent Y/N. You belong to us. I will wipe every trace of him from your body.’

Bucky reached over to smash the speaker when they heard her chuckle suddenly. ‘I’d like to see you try.’

~

Almost 5 weeks later, and nobody had heard from Y/N or seen her. It was like she vanished without a trace; like she never existed. Bucky knew it was because of him. He had very royally fucked up bad with Y/N. The only woman who loved him; saw him for him. Not Sergeant James Barnes, nor the Winter Soldier, Just Bucky.

The last he saw her was when she suddenly emerged out of a pile of turbo engines; her face ashen as she looked at all four men who stared back at her. Shaking her head, she merely inclined her head, before whispering, ‘I somehow felt the Avengers would be different. Maybe more understanding. But, again, my own expectations have let me down. I cannot work with you if you cannot trust me. And if that is what it took for you to trust me, then it means you never will.’

Gesturing towards the video playing behind Stark, where they saw that though the audio had been switched off, the video had not; and Y/N was getting prepared to be raped again. Slamming the laptop screen shut, Steve attempted to speak but she held up her hand.

‘I’m not angry. Really, I’m not angry, and neither am I sad.’ Murmuring more to herself, gently pushing a small nail back and forth with her toe. ‘Just resigned, that this will be my fate.’

He knew it was a blatant lie, just from the blank expression slowly spreading across your face. You were furious. You were trying to let them off gently, end your relationship where it wouldn’t get ugly. He wished he had the courage to push you that it would have been ugly. Ugly meant feelings; meant that you both were willing to fight for each other. But, again, his lack of courage failed him; and the broken look in her eyes spoke volumes.

He had really fucked it up this time with you. This wasn’t any other woman; not another stupid meaningless date where they hoped he would take them home but instead he would scare them, belittle them. This was you; and how everything you did, said mattered to him. And the realisation that, it mattered to you vice versa.

Once you discovered he doubted you, your credibility, your past; you had made the decision to leave. They always promised to change; to value her exactly as she is; but they never ever came through. She cursed herself for thinking Bucky could have broken that streak. Each time, someone new would hurt you; each time you would tell yourself, that’s it, no more men. Hate them, can live without them.

Now, you were bound to the one who didn’t just break your heart. He shat on it, tore it to pieces, and then ate each piece one by one. Worse, you couldn’t cum. Not without his permission; and that was the real damper on things. You would never tell him though. It was over, whatever was there between you two, he killed it.

You were done now, very officially done. It had hurt leaving him, walking away from them, walking away from him, as you took each agonising step after another to the door.

‘Y/N? Please, just hear me out. Y/N, please…’ His voice drifted from downstairs, that dreaded Brooklyn accent, one you dreamt about throughout your entire ordeal.

‘Just don’t. Save your breath.’ Your back was to him so he couldn’t see the tears falling, yet your voice gave away the raw emotion.

‘Just hear me out. I overheard Nico talking about this a few days ago, and he seemed like he knew what happened. Then the note and video appeared. It’s your handwriting, exactly the same. Signed with your name. What was I supposed to think?’

Swallowing hard, you barely heard the words coming out of your mouth, but your voice held steady this time. ‘Nico? You chose to believe Nico over me? You ask what were you supposed to think. How about was Nico really there when I was being gang raped and brainwashed to be the next Draupati? How about let me ask Y/N about this, and ask her for a handwriting sample. How about let me give her the benefit of the doubt as I know what it’s like to be treated like a ticking time bomb?!’

He flinched at every question, knowing that you spoke the truth. He reacted rashly, and rather than asking you, he jumped on the blame bandwagon, unable to fathom his own stupidity for trusting you.

‘I know I hurt you, but let’s talk this out. I’ll explain everything to the others. I’ll-‘.

He cut himself short when he realised you were no longer there. Bruce rushed out then, and handed him his phone. The screen glowed harshly in the stairwell as he read the message.

**‘I’m done fighting for you. Loving you. Defending you. I’m done with all of you.’**


End file.
